Monday, April 23

Contact

There was once a time when you could contact me directly through this site, thanks to the miracle of Blogger comments. Those halcyon days are long gone, however, because I changed the theme of the site and suddenly the comment buttons were enormous and didn't actually work, so I got rid of them. It took me four hours of fiddling around to get the top bar working, I wasn't going to spend any more time making the comments system work just so some absolute anus could bombard you all with penis enlargement ads any time Blogger's system developed a hole.

If you want to contact me, you can do it at blandford@blandfordexaminer.co.uk, but please be aware that I reserve the right to keep and republish anything you send me, particularly hate mail. This isn't to discourage you from doing so, as if you write anything else it's going to be pretty dull for readers of this site to read my regular email, but I do like to publish a good bit of anyone telling me they're going to chop my bollocks off because I didn't agree with them, or called their favourite celebrity a doody-head.

Before you write, here's a few pointers:

1) Yes, I reserve the right to republish anything you send me. Disclaimers in your emails won't work, legalese won't work, and your tears won't work. If you contact me and it's something you don't like, then don't come crying to me when I publish it. If I'm nice I might remove your contact details, but if you're being a cunt I probably won't.

2) Yes, I will write for you. If you want me to write properly for any publication, be it paper or web based - you can even sky-write it if you want - then just ask. If there's money involved or a reasonably large presence, I will probably do it. I'll even drop the swearing. Similarly, if you want to reproduce any of my content elsewhere with permission (because if you do it without permission, you're just a cock - I won't bother doing a great deal about it unless you've got lots of money, but you're still a cock) then just ask, although you will probably have to pay. I don't give out my countless hours of miserable whining for free, you know.

3) No, this is not an autoresponder. That's an actual email address that I check rather than some dump mailbox that I might go through every few months, because I know how fucking annoying that can be when you get something back that says you'll receive a response shortly, then six months later you're still sat on your backside waiting. If I don't reply to you, I was probably too bored to bother, so sending more will just get you blocked.

So there you go. Email away.

blandford@blandfordexaminer.co.uk

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