Bloody hell, I've left this a bit late havent I? Whoops. Oh well, I'm a bit worse for wear so I'll keep it short to avoid embarrassing myself. To start off with, I'd like to throw my hat into the ring to be the bloke Joe Calzaghe faces in his last fight before retirement, just like every other bastard who's ever thrown a punch has since early sunday morning. I've watched his bouts, I've seen his style and I reckon I could leg it around the ring fast enough to keep away from him for 12 rounds and only lose by unanimous decision, which is more than most people have managed. People in my local would fear and respect me as the bloke who went twelve rounds with Joe Calzaghe. Unless any of them had seen me peg it around the ring for the previous eleven before slipping over on a puddle of my own terrified piss and mashing my face into a turnbuckle. Maybe I should try pro wrestling instead - at least there the great hulking bastards can't properly hit me.
Actually, bollocks to all of it. I wouldn't stay up until three in the morning just to get my head punched in for American TV, so I think I'll just sit here and wail on the internet. Speaking of three in the morning, do you know what that is in Mecca time? No, it's not speed bingo, it's the Saudis, insisting that Mecca is the center of the earth and that time should be measured from the location of Mecca rather than GMT. Now don't run away just yet, I'm not going to go into a tantrum and call them every name under the sun like I usually do, I'm just going to point out that they don't have to use GMT, and in fact it would be pretty stupid of them to do so, because it would mean them all getting up in the middle of the night to go to work. Does anyone use GMT instead of their local time zone? Really? It's a non issue as far as I'm concerned. It's not like when I go abroad I stick to Greenwich Mean Time, or I'd end up on the beach at four in the morning wondering when I was going to get the sun tan I'd been promised.
Anyway, one question I've always wanted answered is this: why do paedophiles always wear glasses? That's not to say all people who wear glasses are paedophiles, although it would explain why, being a bit old for that sort of thing, I don't get a great deal of attention from sexy emo chicks, but it does seem to be something of a trend. Also, is it me or are paedophiles getting younger? We've got that Downs-looking bloke with child porn in the Shannon case who's 22, and now this bloke is 17 and has been sent down for interfering with a toddler. What sort of thing messes you up that badly, that early? It used to be the case that you only had to be frightened of squinty old men in dirty overcoats, so you could always tell who was a kiddie-fiddler and who wasn't. Now, you just can't tell, although this bloke does have the typical piggie leer. And a 22-month old? For fuck's sake. I'm not defending 'lesser' paedophilia but when you see 15-year-old girls sleeping around with guys in their 20s or 30s with expensive cars, you can see why they might do it - 15-year-old girls, for better or worse, generally cannot be discerned from 18 or 19 anymore, so hormonally I can see the attraction, but 22 fucking months? I hope you fucking burn.
Oh, and the government of the Palestinian areas of Israel, Hamas, have said they still refuse to accept the existence of it's parent state. That is a fucking surprise.
Goodnight.
Edit: Bollocks, I really need to learn to proofread.
Actually, bollocks to all of it. I wouldn't stay up until three in the morning just to get my head punched in for American TV, so I think I'll just sit here and wail on the internet. Speaking of three in the morning, do you know what that is in Mecca time? No, it's not speed bingo, it's the Saudis, insisting that Mecca is the center of the earth and that time should be measured from the location of Mecca rather than GMT. Now don't run away just yet, I'm not going to go into a tantrum and call them every name under the sun like I usually do, I'm just going to point out that they don't have to use GMT, and in fact it would be pretty stupid of them to do so, because it would mean them all getting up in the middle of the night to go to work. Does anyone use GMT instead of their local time zone? Really? It's a non issue as far as I'm concerned. It's not like when I go abroad I stick to Greenwich Mean Time, or I'd end up on the beach at four in the morning wondering when I was going to get the sun tan I'd been promised.
Anyway, one question I've always wanted answered is this: why do paedophiles always wear glasses? That's not to say all people who wear glasses are paedophiles, although it would explain why, being a bit old for that sort of thing, I don't get a great deal of attention from sexy emo chicks, but it does seem to be something of a trend. Also, is it me or are paedophiles getting younger? We've got that Downs-looking bloke with child porn in the Shannon case who's 22, and now this bloke is 17 and has been sent down for interfering with a toddler. What sort of thing messes you up that badly, that early? It used to be the case that you only had to be frightened of squinty old men in dirty overcoats, so you could always tell who was a kiddie-fiddler and who wasn't. Now, you just can't tell, although this bloke does have the typical piggie leer. And a 22-month old? For fuck's sake. I'm not defending 'lesser' paedophilia but when you see 15-year-old girls sleeping around with guys in their 20s or 30s with expensive cars, you can see why they might do it - 15-year-old girls, for better or worse, generally cannot be discerned from 18 or 19 anymore, so hormonally I can see the attraction, but 22 fucking months? I hope you fucking burn.
Oh, and the government of the Palestinian areas of Israel, Hamas, have said they still refuse to accept the existence of it's parent state. That is a fucking surprise.
Goodnight.
Edit: Bollocks, I really need to learn to proofread.
No comments:
Post a Comment